Random Tuesday Thoughts

Thank you to Proud Mommy for giving me a reason to put all my crazy thoughts down:

1. I had a training class today and it was interesting and informative but the one thing I always wonder when I meet new people is I wonder what they think of me? Not in a self-absorbed kind of way but more of a curious manner. Do they think I am funny? DO they think I am annoying? Fat? Ugly? Cute? Nice?

2. I have a million things to do yet here I sit. It's 10:30 and I still have one load of laundry to put in the dryer and finish putting groceries away and get garbage around for tomorrow since it's garbage day.

3. I really think I am losing my mind. Not sure yet if it's voluntary. What do you do when you feel so strongly about someone/something and your hands are tied.

4. As long as it's not raining tomorrow both sets of Grandparents are coming up to watch Evan's baseball game tomorrow. Should be fun, and Evan is going to go home with my parents to stay until this weekend when Owen and I will head that way.

5. I got my new bike and have ridden it a mile or three the last few nights. My butt is sore and my legs feel like spaghetti. I hope it starts working because the starving myself thing sucks!

Freakin out Friday

I am establishing a new day out here in Blogland. I have seen Wordless Wednesday and Thankful Thursday and so on and so forth. I have yet to see Freakin out Friday so here we go.

Why am I freaking out you ask? For various reasons, some very small and some a little bigger at least in my deluded mind.
1. My house is a mess and it's driving me crazy. Evan had three games this week and I really need to dust, vacuum, clean the bathroom and just in general pick up. I sit here at work thinking how I need to clean.

2. They moved our desks at work this week. Same job, same people, but our boss finally got tired of the people who were bickering and bitching to him so he moved the majority of us. I was in the corner in a nice quiet cubicle, I didn't have to look at anyone if I didn't want to , and now, now I am in the middle of the PIT! Right smack in the middle of the room and it's loud, and I am facing people and I feel like I am on display. I am not complaining to anyone (except you) because it is what it is but I still don't like it.

3. I keep having dreams about that person and last night was a DOOZY. I dreamt that he was at my parent's house of all places, and he was talking about going on a date. When I asked him who he was going on a date with he looked at me and leaned in with a little smile and said "Well you of course", then he kissed me. I wished I was still sleeping.

I could go on but that is the gist for the week. I am sure I will have a plethora of issues next week!

Wordless Wednesday

My Sweetboy Part 2

My boy is eight now. Sometimes I cannot believe he is that old. He still loves to sit on my lap and be cuddled. He still likes for me to lay with him for a few minutes at night. He doesn't mind holding my hand in public. I have told him that eventually he won't do any of those things anymore, and he looks at me with his big blue eyes and says "Of course I will Mom!"

The sad part is I know the day will come when he will cringe from a hug or kiss from me. When he won't leap at the chance to go to the store with me. Right now, he is still my sweet little boy.

His dad says I baby him. I don't think I do. I am firm with him, I discipline him, I yell at him (too much some times). He thinks that Evan should be tougher, more aggressive in sports, not such a mama's boy. I don't see an issue. He is eight, not eighteen.

He still likes to watch cartoons his brother does sometimes. Don't get me wrong, he loves Spongebob and obnoxious stuff like that but I don't let him watch stuff alot of other parents let their kids watch. He is kind and gentle, and just and all-around good kid. I want to teach him kindness and respect and responsibility. Not how to take out the other guy. I want him to think of how he can help others as well as himself. Not think, what's in it for me.

I know I can't stop time from marching forward, but for now I will enjoy my sweet little Evan!

In no Condition for this Dispostion

I am tired of being angry. I am tired of being irritated and annoyed and hurt and put out and, and all the rest.

I had a really good weekend. My youngest sister Kelly came up and spent the weekend with me and the boys. Their dad worked Saturday then left Saturday afternoon for a fishing tournament. Kelly and I took the boys to Crossroads Village (another post for another happier time) shopped, went out to eat and watched movies. I love having her come up, the boys adore her and we had a really good time.

Then this afternoon my husband came home. His sunny disposition as always trailing in behind him. I will spare you the gory details but let's just say I was frowning with my arms crossed within five minutes.

I am TIRED OF BEING ANGRY!!! I don't want to do it anymore. I know that something has to change. I tried ignoring him, not saying anything or getting a snotty tone and it's so hard! Now its 10:40 at night and I have to be up at 5:30 to go to work and I am too riled up to even think about sleep!

All I want is to be happy. For one day. From the time I get up to the time I go to bed. Happiness. Calmness. Peacefulness. Is it really too much to ask? I am starting to get stomachaches and my teeth grinding is back and I have been biting my tongue literally until it bleeds. This cannot be a good sign!

Just call me Paleface

I am white. Obviously you know that by looking at my picture, but I mean I am WHITE! Although on my dad's side of the family there is some Native American lineage and my Grandpa on that side could be as brown as a chestnut in the summer, I follow my mother's side of the family who are all of Irish/English descent and are PALE!

I can get a tan. On my arms, and my chest, and my back, and the tops of my legs that is. If I want to get tan anywhere else I have to go to into an actual tanning bed. I haven't been in one in almost ten years. The last time was for my sister's wedding, our dresses were sleeveless and I didn't want to scare any small children with my white arms. (It was in March)

Tanning no longer appeals to me for many reasons: Money, time, having to lather yourself up and then think about all the people who laid here naked before you, and oh yeah that pesky little matter of skin cancer.

I have always been terrified of self-tanners. I conjure up memories of girls in high school who often resembled Oompa Loompa's after their foray's in to self-tanning. I remember vividly playing volleyball against one small Catholic school where all of the girls had glowing orange faces. They must have all gotten together and had a little session of self-tanning

Since technology has progressed tenfold I decided to give the ol' self-tanning another try. I decided I would just do my legs. One of the reasons for this is that my workplace finally decided we don't have to wear nylons any longer if we are in a non- customer contact area. I purchases a bottle of the Nivea Self Tanner. It actually looks like regular lotion. you just have to make sure you rub it in really well especially around your ankles and knees. So far it's working OK. I can see a subtle difference and it doesn't look the slightest bit orange. I am keeping my fingers crossed and just sticking to my legs. I can't press my luck!

Avery's quilt

My niece Avery turned Three this year and I wanted to get her something besides toys and dolls and clothes for her birthday. She has enough of all three, so as I was thinking of what to get her, I remembered my awesome friend Chris (the Quilt-Nazi) had some Olivia fabric.

(Getting ready to cut fabric on left, and the cat putting in her two cents)


If you don't know who Olivia is; she is a cartoon Pig, a little girl who is very precocious and busy. Just like Avery. She started out as a storybook character and now she has her own show on Noggin.

( I ended up doing my own Variation of the Yellow Brick Pattern. I cut Five inch squares and Eight inch strips then pieced them together. I decided to break up the different blocks by sewing long strips of fabric in between)




I called Chris and asked her about the fabric and she did still have it in her private stash. She has an online quilt store, but her own collection of fabric she uses is almost as big as what she sells! She cut me several fat quarters which included about five different Olivia fabrics and about four more of the corresponding backgrounds. She wouldn't take any money for it at all which I am eternally grateful so I only spent about $25 on the border, binding ,backing and batting. I also bought too much of each so I have lots of leftovers to add to my
stash. I also found fusible batting which my novice eyes had never seen before. It worked OK. I still ending up pinning a bit but not bad. One of the women I work with who is an awesome quilter/sewer said she uses the fusible for smaller projects.