Things I wouldn't be caught dead in

I have never claimed to be a fashionista.  I like to dress nice.  I like to look nice.  I love to watch What Not To Wear and either pretend I am Stacy London because she always looks fab!

I like to look at what people wear at work  I sometimes cannot believe some of the clothes that people actually wear.  I often wonder if they have mirrors.  They may not know how something truly looks. I'm not trying to be mean but so many people just don't wear clothes that actually fit!  Even skinny girls wear clothes that just hang on them!

After careful consideration here is a list of things I would NEVER wear:

MOM Jeans- you know those high-waisted ones
Anything with a puppy or a kitty or any animal
Anything with fringe
Or Glitter
Or sparkles( the only exception is my cute Reindeer Tshirt that is black and the reindeer is in sparkles)
Leggings (unless you weigh 95 pounds, leggings are out)
A Christmas Sweater or shirt
Pajama's in public ( The only time this is acceptable is if you are running to store and 3AM for medicine)
A shrug (They just don't make any sense to me)
Flowery clothes (one or two flowers are ok but anything more than that looks like curtains)
A top that isn't long enough so that when you sit it rides up and the world can see your undies
Velvet (enough said)

This is it

The corner has been turned and there is no looking back.  All we have to do now is figure out the hard stuff.  Who gets the kids when?  What am I taking with me?  How do I tell the kids?  Owen won't be so hard.  He is two.  It's something he will just grow up with.  Evan is eight.  This is going to hit him hard, but he knows something is up.  When your parents don't talk to each other you can kind of figure something is up.  I am preparing for the worst and hoping for the best.  I always do that anyway.  I figure if I expect the worst outcome to any situation I can only pleasantly surprised.

I know I have tons of support and love from family and friends.  I don't like to ask for help or anything but  now is not the time to take the high road.  I have to have help.  Help with the kids sometimes and help getting stuff for the house. 

I never imagined this twelve years ago when I got married, but for the sake of my sanity and for the sake of my boys this is my only choice.

What I have been doing

Gathering all my strength and courage
Doing things on my own
Worrying about my Grandpa who had surgery two weeks ago
Paying bills and trying out a new budget
Playing with the boys alot
Looking for a new house
Trying to be at peace with myself
Listening to the New Moon SOundtrack over, and over, and over again
Daydreaming
Not sleeping
Writing lots of lists
Preparing for the worst
Hoping for the best