I want to be part of a team

I have been thinking alot about what is wrong with my marriage. Besides the fact that we cannot get along at all, some other things have been bothering me. The biggest is that we don't work together at all. I don't know if we ever did. We both work full time but its almost always been me coming home making dinner and doing all the cleaning up. I never asked him to really do anything and with only one kid it wasn't that big of a deal.

Now we have two and i have a different job that requires me to sometimes work later than daycare is open. That means he has to pick up the kids and occasionally get dinner ready. But we still don't work together. It's almost like we keep score, I did this so I am not going to do that.

My sister has a wonderful husband. He does things without being asked. He just does things because they need to be done, not because someone asked him to or nagged him. They get along great and yes they have their moments and she complains about him from time to time, but they really have a good marriage. For example; when we go out there for dinner, the minute dinner is done he and my sister work together, to clean up and put stuff away. The other night the boys and i stayed and my sister was doing laundry, he sat right down with her and helped fold and put away. He got my niece ready for bed and helped her brush her teeth while my sister finished up some things. No one had to ask the other to do anything, it just got done.

I know I am not the only wife in the world who wishes her husband would help out. I just want someone to help out without feeling like there was something I didn't do, or should have to again keep score or point out what they did. I was talking to my brother in law about this and he said "I just do what needs to be done". And that is exactly it, he just does it. If my sister needs some time to do something alone he takes my niece outside, or wherever he is going. No nagging, prying, prodding.

The problem is this is just one of many things. everyone asks me what is going on and I don't have one major thing. He isn't abusive, he doesn't drink or do drugs. He works hard. He just isn't a nice person.

I want to be married to someone who wants to work together to make our family happy. Is that too much to ask?

The best friends are the old ones...

My oldest friend in the world is Christy. We met in Kindergarten and have been friends since. We played together all the time. When my youngest sister was born, Erin and I stayed at her house.

Over the years we have really tried to stay in touch. Months have gone by and then we start emailing again. Our oldest two kids are only four months apart. I went to see her when I was still pregnant, then took Evan over when he was just a little guy. She drove up with Grace to see me and Evan, then her and her husband came up with Grace and spent the day.

The last time I actually saw her other than maybe running into her in the store for a minute was when our oldest two were three years old. She had just found out she was pregnant with her son.

This week I am spending some time at my parents and we finally got together. I took the boys over to her house and we grilled out (well, Chris did) and caught up and the kids had a blast!

It's so weird to see our kids playing together like we did over 30 years ago!

Thankful Thursday

After an extremely long day at work and at home I need to relax and unwind and think of all the things I am thankful and happy for:
*My vacation is one day away! One more day of work then I am off till August 31st!
*My little guy is finally sleeping through the night almost all the time!
*I won $10 on a scratch off lottery ticket (only cost $2)
* I found Love in the Time of Cholera marked down and the bookstore
*I found some really cute work pants at Fashion Bug that make my butt look good!
*My mom is on vacation next week too, I get to spend some really quality time with her!
* I will have time to actually do some things and get some projects done next week!

And last but not least someone at work got a virus on their PC today and my favorite IT guy spent a couple hours on our floor! (Yes I know I am crazy thank you!)

Goodbye Kitty

Last Friday we had our cat put to sleep. Well I had her put to sleep because I took her to the vet. I have had her at least 12 years and she may have been about 13 or 14.

For the last few months she has been acting weird. She was howling at night, and not just at full moons. She was throwing up alot. I could tell it was getting hard for her to climb up and down the stairs and in the last couple weeks she started going outside of her cat box. She had never done that before so it concerned me. The Friday before last was little man's birthday and we were going to the other side of the state for the weekend. I got home and picked her up and noticed that her pupils were not the same size. One was very large and the other was small.

Right away I called the vet but because she didn't seem to be in any pain we made an appointment for first thing Monday.

Monday rolls around and the vet's office calls; my vet is sick, she has kidney stones and they need to reschedule for Wednesday. Tuesday night I get a message that they still don't have a replacement vet and I need to call and reschedule again. They were not open at all on Wednesday so I called Thursday for first thing again Friday morning.

My cat was never an outdoor cat. The only times she ever went outdoors is when we moved and the few times she had to go to the vet. I had to drop off the boys before I went and She howled the whole way to vet. This upset Evan, who I think knew what was coming.

The vet (not the normal vet) and vet tech checked her out and she had lost three pounds since I took her last a couple years prior, and they could tell her eye that had the larger pupil was unresponsive and that there was bleeding. They wanted to do about $258 in tests, and probably would have come back and said there was nothing they could do for her. I talked to the vet tech who was wonderful and I decided to put her down. She just wasn't herself anymore and with the news they gave me I just couldn't see prolonging her life.

I don't think the vet was very happy but too bad because I didn't like her at all and it was my cat. She made a couple of remarks under her breath about doing everything possible. IF my cat had been about six I would have done the tests but they seemed unnecessary and inhumane to me. I was with her when she went and it only took about a minute. I brought her home and we buried her in our backyard. Right now there is a small Cross but we are going to find a nice marker.

The vet tech and the office manager sent Evan a nice workbook home and we talked about it and he put on a brave front until about 10:30 at night. He started crying and of course talking about death, then talking about people in our family who are old, like the greatgrandparents.

We decided that when I am on vacation next week we would pitch our tent and sleep in the backyard with Kitters. I still look for her around the house and my little guy doesn't understand. We are getting a dog in the spring, but Kitters will still be our first pet.

Pour Some Sugar on Me!

A few weeks ago I went to see Cheap Trick, Poison, and Def Leppard. I went with my friend Nicole, her friend Jodi and my friend from work Beckie. Nicole and I saw Def Leppard together about 17 years ago when we were 19 (man are we old) It was awesome then and we were psyched for this one too.

The original plan was for me, Nicole, and our other girlfriends from High School, Nicole and Jen to all go together, we got the tickets and were ready. Then life happens and plans change and Nicole and Jen couldn't go (BOO) and Jodie and Beckie took their place. About 15 people from where I work were going also so we tailgated and met up and all sat together.
The concert was at DTE (Pine Knob) Which is an amphitheatre. Of course you sit on the lawn, that is where the party is. It was so fun. Cheap Trick was fine. Everyone sat talking while they were on, they were like the appetizers at a wedding, you nibble and chit-chat but everyone is waiting for the main course.

Poison was good. I saw them in high school. Up front. Main row, watching Bret Micheals shimmy down a pole! They were OK, Bret sounded a little hoarse but all in all a good time.

Def Leppard was awesome! The guys sounded and looked great. A little older but still hot!!! They put the concert up on the screens so we who sat in the grass could see them well, by the end we were screaming and laughing and dancing.

Afterwards they were handing out passes to go to some club the next town over to hang out with Poison. We didn't ride with Nicole and Jodie so we got separated in the parking lot, come to find out the next morning they went! They crowded into this club and got to meet Bret Micheals! Nicole was so geeked, and I was geeked for her. Next stop --Rock of Love!!!!!

Monday Random Banter

It's Monday, Yeah!! Not really but just trying to be positive. Why does Monday get such a bad rap? It's the beginning of a new week yet people always gripe about Mondays. They pine for the Friday-Saturday -Sunday back!

This last weekend was a whirlwind, Owen's 2nd birthday was Friday. I took half a day off and finished up shopping for his party and running errands. Friday night we took off for the in-laws. That night I met up with some friends from high school at a local bar. I haven't seen them in several years and it was fun. Two of my friends had gotten married and now they live in South Carolina- they come up in the summer for a couple weeks and at Christmas. There was a small group of us and we had a blast. There was also a table of people that graduated a couple years prior so it was fun seeing them also.

Saturday was baby boy's party, just family out at my sister's house. I will have pictures soon and a funny video of my niece Avery wrestling the dog for a toy. It was nice, he got a lot of Diego stuff and he wanted to take it all to daycare with him today.

Yesterday Evan went fishing with his dad and Grandpa, they caught 43 bluegills of which he caught three and one crappie, then descended on the snack box and ate everything his grandma packed for snacks. We had lunch and the great-grandma's visited and then my brother-in-law came over with my nephew. We don't see them often even though they live about 7 miles from the in-laws. They are just a different kind of folks and it's fine with me if we only see them a few times a year. My BIL didn't bring his "woman" which also was fine because she gets on my last nerve and my very unkind side comes out when she is around.

I have several things I need to get done, including my Great-Grandma's quilt, cleaning my basement and organizing clothes to get ready to put summer ones away and see what is going to fit for winter.

Hopefully this week I get some time to post pics from the Def Leppard/Poison concert we went to a few weeks ago. It was a blast.

What a deal!

I love a good deal. In fact, I thrive on good deals. Show me a loaded clearance rack and I will be a happy, happy girl. I love Coupons. I ALWAYS shop with them. I learned this from my mom and I think I actually use more than she does now!

I have tried shopping at several different stores but lately I have been going between Kroger and Meijer's and Walmart. They are all relatively close to me and depending on the ads I sometimes go to all three. Kroger is kind of like Publix for those of you in the South.

For those of you who can shop at Kroger you should for a couple of reasons. One, they double their coupons up to a dollar! Meijers only does up to fifty cents and Walmart doesn't at all! Two, their ads run concurrent with the coupons in your Sunday paper plus most weeks they have extra money off your bill if you buy certain items, plus those items usually have coupons.

Another way to save if you don't like to clip them is the Internet. You can go to Kroger.com and load coupons on your card. You can use those plus your paper ones. They don't double the ones on the card.

Also, I have come across a website called Couponmom.com Its free! All you do is sign up and they send you emails of when the newest coupons have been loaded. Some of them you cannot double but they also have links to Smartsource and RedPlum which are the inserts you get in the paper and you can print from there too!

My last two times to Kroger, my bill came to at least $113.00. I walked out both times paying about $65.00! Plus alot of the stuff was free! They have Colgate toothpaste on Sale for $2, just use your $1 coupon doubled, Free! This week they have Always and Tampax for 1.99 if you buy four of the participating items, they don't have to be four of these , but there are $1 off coupons in the paper and they are doubled, so FREE.

Some of my girlfriends have taken coupon classes for Krogers. The lady has them over to her house and teaches them how to shop the ads, plus she sends them a spreadsheet of the free stuff they can get. Personally I can do this by looking online and at the ads so I prefer not to pay for the service.

Recently I had $1 coupons for Nestle Purelife water. Walmart had a 24pack for $3. The only take the $1.00 of but 24 bottles of water for $2 is pretty awesome to me, Especially when everywhere you go you pay $1 for a bottle of water!

We have a nice little stockpile going, not that I think anything is going to run out but if its free or nearly free then I am all for it. Right now I have 7 toothpastes, 4 shampoos, 10 rolls of paper towels, 11 boxes of different kinds of macaroni, six boxes of Pop-tarts and assorted items and I paid next to nothing. Plus my pantry is overflowing and my other cupboards are full. The only items I buy on the off weeks that we don't get paid are Milk and Fruit.

Coupons, if you don't use them, then you make too much money!!!!